Criticism is not a cool thing for everyone, whether it’s coming from your teacher or from your frenemy. Criticism can be of two types, one is constructive criticism and the other is destructive criticism. If the criticism is meant to be constructive, then you can utilize it to become a more improved person. And if it’s only meant to harm or hurt you intentionally, then you can simply ignore it like cookies and ad pop-ups on any website. It’s true that nobody likes being criticised and but, unfortunately it is a verity of life. The smartest way to deal with criticism is responding to it rather reacting. To be able to respond to criticism with integrity and neutrality is an important life skill, which few people must obtain. If you respond wisely to criticism with careful consideration, it will be easy for you avoid unnecessary sufferings. Here are the following smart ways for dealing with criticism effortlessly.
1. Analysing the lessons to learn from criticism
“Learning to receive false criticism feedback that has no constructive value, without losing your confidence is a must if you want to do big things in life.” Most criticism is usually based on some truths partially to be frank. Criticism seems to be negative mostly due to the wrong tone and immediate reaction. But, through criticism we get the opportunity to learn and improve from their suggestions. Just you have to appreciate the constructive ones wisely and ignore the destructive criticisms blindly.
2. Responding to the flaws and suggestions, not to the tone
The most critical problem is that people may give you valuable critical suggestions, however, their tone and manner of criticism means that we respond not to the suggestions but react to their confrontational manner. To deal with crticism we need to separate the criticism from the style or manner of criticism. Even if people speak in a tone and mood of anger, we should try to unplug their emotions from the useful suggestions lies beneath.
3. Valuing criticism
“Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish a man’s growth without destroying his roots.” We people have a natural habit of only valuing praise, the words that make us feel happy. But when people criticise we feel miserable and dejected. But, if we wish to improve and develop we should welcome constructive criticism and appreciate their suggestions. To avoid the negative response in our mind for those criticisms we need to think smartly that “This is good for me!”,..”This can help me to improve actually.”
4. Try not to take it personally
When you are being criticized, you need to stay calm and not take it personally. Reacting emotionally and accepting things personally you will only make the situation worse. Behavioral research asserted that emotional reactions are negative despite of whether the criticism itself is good or bad. This is one of the biggest issue which occurs regarding criticism. When people criticise us directly, we should not feel they are criticising our real self but, just a vague aspect of ourselves.
5. Deconstruct criticism
You have to make out small segments of criticism you receive. Break those down into four segments: listen carefully, look for clarification, find intention, and identify truths.
First listen and don’t say anything as understanding a critic’s argument makes your mind go through the entire format to work on how it’s constructed which is called self-analysis. Next, look for clarification through questions. The Power Communications experts says that you should be aimed at turning the critic’s generalities into specifics and exposing the objective facts behind judgmental statements. For example, if a critic says you’re lazy, ask which specific behavior makes him/her think that.
Third, find out the critic’s intention. Is it negatively or positively designed, or it is a personal attack or a constructive point.
Fourth, identify the truth and suggestions, which parts of the criticism can help you improve and which works best within your comfort zone.
6. Understand the critic
If you truly want to welcome and accept criticism, you need to figure out where the critic is coming from. Know if he is qualified to criticize you. Are they well educated and experienced enough to frame the arguments? If they are, then take the criticism seriously and if they are not, consider it too, but focus on the specifics to deal with criticism smartly. Because people who are not qualified still make good judgments.
7. Avoid destructive or false criticism
It’s true that sometimes we get criticised with no such justification which is a painful experience. But, possibly we can deal with it more easily than the justified criticism. One option is to stay aloof and ignore it completely. If we remain calm and detached the criticism is given no energy to breathe. If we feel like it’s necessary to fight back, we give it more importance than it deserves. “Criticism is something you can easily avoid by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.”
8. Don’t react immediately, respond calmly
Smartest way to deal with criticism is to respond not react. Wait a little before responding and try not to respond with feelings of anger or insulted pride for which you might have to regret over it. Waiting patiently can enable us to reflect in a calmer and wiser way.
9. Keep your stress low
When we’re constantly forced to the edge, there are chances to lose the control making us unable to respond to criticism with a clear and calm head. So better take a deep breath to keep your stress levels in check and to make your head free if emotions.
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10. Don’t forget to smile
Smiling is an amazing tool that improves your personality. Even a false or fake smile can helps you to relax more. It creates a more positive vibration and force that smoothes the situation. Smiling will definitely help you psychologically. Smiling will also motivate the other person to control and manage their approach. Silence and smiles are two powerful tools. Smile is the way to solve many problems and silence is the way to avoid many problems.
11. Keep moving on
Always remember that the criticism highlights just one person’s opinion. Know what your strengths are and never let other people’s opinions keep you far from working hard towards your goal. Don’t ever feel bad if you’re not able to digest all of these negative words as it takes practice to stop caring about what people think.